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Trusting God When My Brain Won’t Cooperate

trusting god during hard times Pastor Brandon

A personal story of anxiety, faith, and learning to trust God when understanding falls apart

I have a confession. I struggle with crippling anxiety.

Not the occasional, “big meeting tomorrow” kind. I’m talking about the kind that shows up uninvited… even when life is good.

Especially when life is good.

Because if nothing’s wrong, my brain assumes I’ve probably missed something. Like a smoke detector going off with no smoke—just noise, panic, and a growing sense that something must be burning somewhere.

I’ve carried this since I was a pre-teen. And for a long time, I quietly wondered if it meant something was wrong with my faith.

But here’s what I’ve learned after 40+ years of walking with Jesus:

My anxiety isn’t proof that I don’t trust God. It’s often the signal that I’ve stopped.

The Verse I Can’t Escape

There’s a passage that the Holy Spirit has basically hardwired into my brain. Not metaphorically—I mean daily. Sometimes hourly.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” — Proverbs 3:5–6

I even tattooed it on my arm. Not because it looks cool (it does though)… but because I forget.

Constantly.

When Anxiety Gets Loud

If you’ve ever had real anxiety—the kind that sits on your chest and whispers worst-case scenarios on repeat—you know what I mean.

I can look back at seasons of my life where everything felt like it was collapsing.

Chaos. Loss. Uncertainty. Moments where my prayers weren’t polished—they were desperate.

And in those moments, I didn’t always bring strong faith. Sometimes I showed up with mustard-seed faith… on a good day.

But I showed up.

And now, looking back, another verse makes more sense than it ever did in the moment:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him…” — Romans 8:28

Not all things are good.

Some things were awful.

But somehow… God was still working.

What God Does With Broken Things

I’ve watched Him take things I thought would break me… and build something through them.

  • Childhood pain that quietly shaped a calling I didn’t see coming.

  • Relationships that ended… and made space for the one I couldn’t imagine living without.

  • Job losses that felt like failure… but were actually redirection.

  • Seasons where I lost everything—houses, income, stability—and found something I didn’t even know I was missing: purpose.

If you had asked me in those moments if things were working out for good… I probably would’ve laughed. Or cried. Or both.

But hindsight with God is 20/20.

Every time.

Right Now Is No Different

Here’s the strange part.

Even after all a lifetime of evidence of God's presence… I still wrestle.

Right now, our family is walking through a pretty devastating financial hit. Not because of bad decisions. Just… life happening in ways you don’t plan for.

And my head wants to spiral.

Run the numbers. Lose sleep. Play out every worst-case scenario like it’s a movie I can’t turn off.

But then that voice cuts through the noise:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart…

And I’m telling you—it hits like an IV drip straight into my soul. Like spiritual Zoloft without the prescription.

Not because the problem disappears. But because the weight shifts.

And when the anxiety creeps back—and it does—I go right back to it.

Again. And again. And again.

This Isn’t Prosperity Gospel

Let me be really clear about something, because this matters:

Following Jesus has not made my life easier. In many seasons, it’s made it harder.

But it has always made it anchored.

This path hasn’t always led to comfort or success…but it has always led to peace, to purpose, and to the unmistakable presence of God.

The kind where you know you’re not alone.

The kind where, even in the mess, you sense Him saying:

“I’ve got you. I’m not going anywhere.”

If You’re Fighting Anxiety Too

So if you’re battling anxiety…

I see you.

That constant hum in your chest. That mental exhaustion. That feeling like your own thoughts are working against you.

Don’t confuse that with weak faith.

Sometimes anxiety is just the flare going up saying:

“Hey… you’re carrying something you were never meant to carry alone.”

The Big Idea

Anxiety doesn’t disqualify your faith—it often reveals where trust is still being learned.

One Simple Step Forward

So maybe today isn’t about fixing everything.

Maybe it’s just about this:

Trust Him. Not halfway. Not intellectually. But with all your heart.

Even when your understanding taps out. Even if a solution doesn't appear to be possible.

Submit it. Surrender it. Hand it over—again if you have to.

Because if my life has proven anything…

It’s that He really does direct our paths.

Not always the way we expect. But always the way we need.

And one day, you’ll look back—just like I have—and realize:

He never missed a step. ---- Stay Connected

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